When Diversification Doesn't Work

I'm not sure, but I think it has something to do with correlation...

We've Had Some Budget Cuts

Yes, like most state schools, Unknown University had had some budget cuts - about 10% so far from the original budget. So these three strips by Scott Adams were pretty funny. A bit close to home, but funny.

I've Had Deans Like Catbert

Professor Time vs. Grad Student Time

That reminds me - I have to check up on my grad assistant to see how he's doing on the assignment I gave him at the beginning of the semester.

Happy Halloween

I usually don't post political stuff (because of the moonbat factor). But I just got this from a former student and it tickled me, so what the heck.

The Seven Deadly Sins of the Meltdown

Another thing for my "class" folder:

HT: The Big Picture

A Guide To The Economic Meltdown For Grad Students

If you're a graduate student and worried about how the recent economic turbulence effects you, fear not. The good folks at PhdComics.com have put together a handy guide (click on the picture for a larger version).

How Professors Spend Their Time

I'm in the midst of filling out my annual report (we do one every year to show the powers that be what we did over the previous year). I've got several attachments, to my report, but I'm debating adding this as one more:

Maybe after I'm tenured...

Dogbert Knows Earnings Management.

The second one is pretty timely - particularly since pension assumptions are covered in Level 2 of the CFA curriculum.

We Produce Thecal Matter

Some are just better at piling it.

Happy Independence Day

A happy July 4th to all the Financial Rounds readers out there.

Start by reading the Declaration of Independence here. Then, to get a good feel for the costs born by the Signers of the Declaration, read this (there are a number of versions of it floating around the Internet, and it's been attributed originally to Paul Harvey, but this one is as good as any).

Finally go spend time with family, friends, grill some meat, and light off some fireworks. And if there's apple pie (See above) or baseball involved, so much the better.

As for the Unknown Family, I'm going for a "quick" 20 mile bike ride, followed by our spending the day spent at a family friend's house. We'll have all the essentials - a passel of kids, a grill with lots of critters to cook, various fruit, potato, and pasta salads, a hot tub to hang out in, and fireworks at the park just down the street.

update: the ride went well, Unknown Son was feeling well enough to play with the other kids for about 2 1/2 hours straight in the hot tub (it quickly became the "kiddie pool, so we didn't fire it up above merely warm), and there was plenty of food to be had. The little man is over his recent bout of chemo-induced nausea and vomiting of the recent post, but he still got tired out quickly. So, we left early (we anticipated this, so we took separate cars) and we're now settling in for a little Tom and Jerry action before bed (we believe in a classical education in the Unknown Household - Tom and Jerry, the Three Stooges, Bugs Bunny, etc...).

I suspect Unknown Daughter and Unknown wife will show up around 11 or so. So a happy 4th once again to all.

Lower Interest Rates

This NY Times cartoon is from the early 80's, but it plays just as well today:

HT: The Big Picture

Coffee

My kids already know "When Daddy doesn't have coffee, he gets GRUMPY"

more graph humor and song chart memes

And just in case you don't refill the pot, watch the first 30 seconds of this:


"You kill the jo, you make some mo. You know that, baby!"

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Stretching Accounts Payables

"Stretching" Accounts Payables (i.e. paying accounts payables past the due date without remitting the penalty, or paying after the discount period has expired but still taking the discount) is a common way that some firms gain cheap financing. However, a firm can only get away with it if they have an imbalance of power between them and the vendor. Here are a few Dilbert cartoons that illustrate the basic idea almost perfectly:



Unfortunately, unless you're a Wal-Mart (notorious for abusing their vendors), the flyswatter eventually ends up in the vendors' hands. So, "free" isn't always "free".

If a textbook vendor was smart, they'd just use Scott Adams for most of their illustrations.

Seatology In the Classroom

This might make it into next semester's syllabus.


From PhDcomics.

No, I'm Not Changing Your Grade

I just handed in grades for one of my classes. Not 20 minutes later, I got an email from a student asking why I couldn't give her a "B" because she "tried really hard and worked harder than most of the class". She's let me know repeatedly that she "really needs a "B". I considered sending her this cartoon:


But that would be wrong. Funny, maybe. Satisfying, definitely. But definitely wrong.

HT: Marginal Revolution.

Studies Show That 87% of All Statistics Are Made up On the Spot

Once again, Scott Adams nails it.

Perverse Incentives In Academia

I came across this Dilbert cartoon the other day, and it reminds me of academia.

I've had (tenured) colleagues who regularly "blow up" at one thing or another. It could be that they don't like their teaching schedule (or the number of courses they teach). It could be about travel funds. Regardless, what often happens is that the dean (or deparetment chair) tries to sooth the affronted party by giving them a better schedule, more travel funds, etc...

To summarize, the pattern is

1. Teaching schedule is floated aound
   
2. Colleague gripes about teaching load
3. Dean gives colleague reduced teaching load or better schedule
   

Does anyone see a problem here? Maybe it's me, but it looks like someone's being trained to complain. This is a classic case of perverse incentives.

Unfortunately, I'm not yet tenured, so complaining on my part will only result in my being on the job market once again. So I guess perverse incentives of the Bitch and Get Rewarded variety are only for tenured faculty.

But you already knew that.

Traders Gone WIld

I was talking to a trader friend of mine the other day and he pointed me to this cartoon.

With the recent volatility in the markets, that pretty much sums it up.

HT: The Big Picture

Click on the link - the comments below the post are pretty funny.

updated 4/3: A reader asked who the cartoonist is, so I googled him. It's Mike Keef of the Denver Post. You can see his other work here.

Nobody Enjoys Grading

This is why I try not to grade papers for more than 4-4 1/2 hours at a time.